29 Oct 2012

Hestia's slatternly ways revealed

So, I know that I give Tartarus a hard time for being unromantic, unaffectionate, uncommunicative and all the rest of what I now accept as Being A Scottish Man.

I decided that fair's fair.  Here's what HE'S got to live with.

These are a few pix of the house, prior to tidying up before his arrival last Friday:

This is my side of the bed.  As you can see, you need crampons and a Nepalese guide to find your way through the pile of books, magazines, pads, pencils and pens to locate the actual bed.  This pile of books was in excess of 10 inches tall.  Or, if you work in new money, the height of Kylie Minogue.

This is my dressing table:

You would think, looking at that junk-strewn top that I spend HOURS turning myself into something fit to grace a Hollywood red carpet event.  In actual fact, I spend just enough time on it to turn myself into something fit to grace the outside world without scaring the horses.

This is known as My Office.  As you can see, it is a repository for washing, ironing, miscellaneous painting artefacts and, bafflingly, a small drum kit.

After a few hours work, these places are transformed:

Unfortunately, the hall now looks like this:

Ah well, at least now you have some sympathies for my other half.

But will I ever be able to hold my head up in the Co-op again?

*** just as a postscript - Tartarus was going through the photos on the mac and discovered these.  So he's less pleased with the tidy house than he was when he actually encountered it :-D


  1. Nope, no sympathy at all: I like a house to be a home :-)

  2. Don't understand people who can live in houses that look like they're photos from a glossy magazine. Homes have signs of occupation and mine certainly looks lived in ;)

  3. Replies
    1. Exactly what I was going to say. My god, the before pictures look tidy by my standards!

  4. So, given that the bed is made in that first photo, you are not a slattern. Also, there seems to be no evidence of dirt, you are not a clart. However, given the mess on the floor, you are a trollop!

    Called it, as my teenage kids would say. I am Scottish, they are only American. Called it!!

  5. That forst dressing table picture looks exactly like mine.Its not mess,its a convenient display:)

  6. Or even 'first' though the Geordie would be 'forst'..

  7. I don't see that Tartarus has anything to complain about! What does he care what it's like when he's not around? And as others have said, it's more lived-in than slatternly ;)

  8. A little mess is okay I think. I grew up in a house where post is generally piled on any flat surface and left unopened until it eventually gets shredded though...

  9. That's not messy. My wife needs a machete to get to her side of the bed.


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