27 Jan 2011

Hestia and....... the SECC Carnival

I've been to Blackpool. Twice. And loved its bawdy hands-on-hips attitude to its visitors.  We took Sonshine to the Pleasure Beach both times and we have extended our Bravery Repetoire by at least one stomach-churning ride.

We were in Glasgow at the beginning of January (yep - a Staycation) and Tertarus thought that it would be a Good Thing to go to the Kelvinhall Carnival.  Well, that's what it used to be called.  Now it's the SECC Carnival. The same thing only with a different frock on.

Here is Tertarus and Sonshine on the Ghost Train:

Here is Sonshine and I on the Chair-o-planes .......

Here is Tertarus and Sonshine on the Revolver ride......

 As you can see, we are absolutely SHIT at taking action photos with our new compact digital camera.

And Tertarus is just shit at taking photos, as this stationery one of me and Sonshine waiting for the ride to start proves.

Here's a lovely cake that I photographed the night I Fell On The Ice (more of which later).  Yes, your eyes do not deceive you, it's a MASSIVE Tunnocks Teacake cake.  Had to photograph it at an angle cos the flash kept bouncing off the glass and just whiting everything out.

The break in Glasgow was great....right up until Tertarus put me on a ride at the Carnival that I hadn't seen running beforehand.

'What does it do?' I asked *brave face on*. 

'It's sort of like a Waltzer only with more g-force,' he smiled, clunking the safety barrier into place in front of us.  Sonshine smiled up at me. 'Don't worry, mummy, I'm here.'

I rattled the bars to get out. 'But I don't like rides that go around and around like that.  I like rides that go up and down.'  I rattled the bar some more.  Tertarus at least had the good grace to blanche.  I closed my eyes and waited for it to be over......

There was a lot of spinning around, and spinning around on top of the spinning around and when the two spinning arounds co-incided, the G-force pull was incredible.  And very nausea-making.

It may just have been co-incidence, but I could start to feel my Monthlies arriving.  Three days early.  On the middle of a RIDE at the carnival.

By the time the ride stopped, I couldn't even open my mouth to shout at Tertarus, I felt so bilious.  I got off the ride and my buckling legs carried me down the steps and onto terra firma.  There was no two ways about it, I was going to be sick....plus, as I hobbled off to the toilets (mercifully right next door) I knew that my period had arrived.

Reader, by the time I got into my cubicle I looked as if I'd been shot in the arse.

I was, thankfully, a Good Girl Guide and was prepared for early arrivals and managed to sort myself out.  But that was the end of the rides.

Tertarus and Sonshine gave me a family hug when I emerged and Tertarus offered an apology.  Which was terribly rare and very nice of him.

They opted to go on the dodgems and I sat weakly on a bench, leaning against a wheely bin and hoping that I wasn't going to feel shit any more.

I was wrong.  More to follow at the weekend......


  1. Dear Alison, I really feel for you, I absolutely hate all those rides, I lost all credibility with the boys at Legoland about 4 years ago as I was terrified on quite a gentle little ride; now I just stick to Miss Tiggy's Safari (small slow train where me and lots of 3 year olds trundle around and look at plastic elephants and lions, that is all the excitement I can handle). My idea of hell is a day at Thorpe Park. xx

  2. Even though I'm from Blackpool, I'm rubbish at fairground rides - I get travel sick going driving down the road at 20mph so you won't catch me on the Waltzers. Looking forward to the next installment - and love the giant Tunnocks cake!

  3. Ooh, I love Tunnocks Teacakes

  4. Dear Ali, those pictures are unbelievably shit, but hilariously so.

    I love rides - the more G force the better! I'll get on anything. I thought it might die down as I got older but it hasn't.

    Where do I buy a giant Tunnocks teacake cake from?? That is genius!! Love C xx

  5. OOh that took me right back to the time I had too much vegi lasagne & too many funfair rides and actually vommed mid ride. The ride stopped promptly afterwards and I didn't hand around to see who I had caught in the chunder cloud. Poor unsuspecting spectators!!
    Love the photos - hilarious!!! Claire x

  6. i used to do the round'n round rides until puberty hit and put a stop to that. now i like roller coasters, although i invariably end up with a sore throat from all the screaming.

    i once joined a friend for one of those rickety traveling carnivals with shitty rides, bought a bunch of tickets and spent the rest of the evening sitting forlornly side by side trying very hard not to puke on the sidewalk. it was an inglorious way for a saturday night to end for two girls in their twenties.

  7. I thought the photos had just been very cryptically edited! Waltzers are way more evil than they used to be. Very humiliating - especially when you've just had an egg'n'cress sandwich.

  8. Not my cup of tea, even with a giant Tunnocks wafer as a bribe. They'd only let me on once, and then they'd have to aplogize to the person in front of me who just received the pebble dashing

  9. oh my god.....you could write the ultimate toilet....story....book. Hilarious!!

  10. Sorry you were so ill but it did make for a wonderful post. You had me in stitches with "Reader, by the time I got into my cubicle I looked as if I'd been shot in the arse." Brilliant.

  11. Ali, I love you!

    Sorry your 'blob' as it is referred to in the household (could we be more childish?), arrived on a whirly doofer. that's the worst time to get it ever.

    Except maybe at a school disco while wearing white trousers. remind me to tell you that story!


  12. Hi Ali,

    Oh my, way too much movement and excitement for me! And can you explain what a tunnocks teacake is, and why you'd make a ginormous one? :-)

    Also, I've awarded you a Stylish blogger award: http://innerwhisperscouk.blogspot.com/2011/01/stylish-blogger-award.html

  13. You poor thing, that just happened to me whilst I was skiing but since I have got wireless (in the form of a Mirena) it is nothing like as traumatic - this comment makes sense to me and possibly to you but probably not to anyone else! I used to love fairgrounds but something has changed and now I really don't think I could get on one of those rides anymore.

  14. I used to love those rides but now they scare me to death,must be getting old.
    Love the cake though I'm a Tunnocks snowball devotee myself! X

  15. NS - love a Snowball m'self!

    Mrs P - I understand the Mirena thing entirely *taps side of nose* Ride was hellish.

    Inner Whispers - Chloe! Thank you! I am thrilled to be awarded a Stylish Blogger award. Will try to do responses justice! :-)

    LM - Tell us the white trousers and blob story!

    Jane - thank you!

    Legend - I nearly pebble-dashed my family too :-/

    Trashsparkle - no not edited, we're just unbelievably rubbish at taking pix! Egg 'n' Cress. Nice!

    Polish Chick - I like a roller coaster, up to a point. Don't think I'll ever get myself onto the Pepsi Max ride. It's too high up!

    Butterfly - glad to see that I'm not alone on the waltzer quease :-)

    Christina - isn't that cake BRILL? I don't think that it will be authentic goo and chocolate inside, like the small ones. Probably a sponge. I want one too!

    Ania - they're Scottish biscuits - eat, eat, eat and help the economy of Uddingston thrive!

    Mrs TNMA - I would have thought that fairground rides would be in your DNA if you came from Blackpool!

    Blighty - LEGOland terrified you? Actually, there are a couple of good rides at LEGOland and the wee rollercoasters set me and my brother (also in 40s) off on a wave of nervous laughter that was EMBARASSING.

    Viv - I felt sorry for myself the WHOLE weekend and I shall explain shortly :-)

  16. Nin Jiom Pei Pa Koa (ninjiom-hk.cwahi.net) may be another choice. i know alot of people use it, its also non alcoholic, though it's effectiveness is not as good as alcohol based cough medicine, but it's still good to use on not so serious sore throat.


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