NaNoWriMo this year, which basically means that for the month of November I am eating, sleeping, breathing The Great British Historial Fiction Novel (Draft no: 1). Summary - so far, it's all a bit shit.
Without boring you witless here's how it's panned out so far:
21,822 - the number of words written to date by me
2 - the number of characters that have appeared unexpectedly and now demand to have a bit of story written about them.
1 quantity of utterly gratuitious sex scenes - which is my BEST BIT so far.
730 - number of words in sex scene - so there are therefore over 21,000 of crap to date
1 number of characters ripped apart by fighting dogs
0 - number of laughs in the book to date
2 number of murders
1 number of shiny faced virgins who are about to get terribly despoiled by my anti-hero
20% of the ideas in the book come from family facts (none of the murders. Obviously)
nil - my ability to find my way back to the all important Writing Statistics on my nanowrimo account
so that's what I've been slaving over for the past 14 days. Writing novels is rather hard. *tips hat at published authors* I don't think J K Rowling will have to worry about vacating her slingbacks any time soon....
I fell so far behind with my writing that I had to get up at 5am this morning WHEN IT WAS DARK and write nearly 6,000 words. Which I have DONE. They are rubbish. But they are done *flops onto floor and passes out quietly*
What else is new with Hestia
1 - Sonshine told his gran that he had seen David Tenant in something other than Dr Who. She was hugely impressed to find out that he had starred in Omlet on the telly last year.
2 - We like tormenting Sonshine, so we asked him again, a few days later what else David Tenant had been in and he responded 'Piglet'
3 - He's now not talking to either of us because of persistent teasing.
4 - Tertarus has GONE back to Mexico. Numbers of Brazilian' waxes as yet untroubled by Tertarus in any way shape or form: one.
5 I'd say that either a break up or a stabbing is imminent.
6 - Rufus Sewell was killed off in Pillars of The Earth last week. There is no point in living.
7 - oh and yes, was persuaded to stay on as Chair of TABI for another year, so keep your eyes peeled on Hestia for an opportunity to help TABI help Children in Need next week and get yourself a Tarot reading into the bargain :-)
7....and how could I nearly forget to tell you this???? The BABY arrived early - last Wednesday (by C-section as mum had hoped). He is fine, after an initial touch of jaundice, and weighed in at under 6 lbs. His head is the size of a satsuma and now, mercifully, not that colour. I held him for nearly an hour and sniffed in that new baby smell like the lowliest crack addict.....Calum Daniel Scott Johnston - welcome to the world darling!!!!
So - dear reader - what's happening with you?
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