20 Feb 2013

Hestia and reversals

Some serious reversing issues
Pic:  BBC
Mercury doesn't go retrograde until next week, but I more than made up for it myself the other day.

I think we could blame it on my hormones or the Fast Diet (monthlies and fasting are tricky bedfellows - there's too much coming out and nothing at all going in!)

Anyhoo, I had gone to the supermarket with Sonshine on the first day of half term.  I wasn't too worried because we had plans do Do Things over the following days that I'd promised aaaages ago, but for Wednesday and Thursday,  I was casting around looking for stuff to do.

We went to the supermarket together.

I know.  Not exactly fun - but I wanted him to see that I didn't spend ALL my time in front of the computer and that the food in the fridge had to come from somewhere.  I made a list.  And even better, I remembered to take it with me.

We stood in the supermarket, me issuing orders like Field Marshal Montgomery and Sonshine nipping up and down the aisles fetching milk and bread and all manner of Scottish delicacies....pies, cheese.  Oh yeah, it's like Ocado up here.

Anyway, the shopping was done in lickety-split time and we drove home.  Me, concentrating on some hideous debacle on the Jeremy Vine show.  Sonshine looking out of the window and wishing that he was ANYWHERE but with his mother listening (and shouting along to) the Jeremy Vine show.

I took the car down the drive way and did a little three *cough* or maybe six point turn to ensure that it was facing back up the driveway, and then drove a little closer to the back door.

The three bags were duly unloaded from the boot and Sonshine dutifully carted two of them up to the back door for me.  He's not a bad soul.

And then, dear reader, I hopped back in the car and promptly REVERSED over the last bag.

I didn't even realise that I'd done it until Sonshine came flying over the grass and gingerly peered into the (much flatter) third bag.  I'd left my handbag sitting on top of it and I was suddenly convulsed with the fear that not only had I ruined the weekly shop, but that I'd pulverised my reading glasses.

Sonshine helpfully held up my handbag and gave me the thumbs up sign.  But he shook his head and gave me the thumbs down sign as he pointed to the shopping bag.

And then he could not restrain himself any further and fell about laughing like a drain.

Here is some of the evidence of my driving skillz:

This coleslaw was once a lovely head of celery.  It's now an inch thick.

A whole bag of lemons - makes a lot of juice swilling around in your Tesco Bag For Life
These two smiley faced doods made a hell of a mess.
But saved some of the juice from them to curdle milk to make soda bread *woohoo*

Have you gone into reverse about something recently?!


  1. Today I just struggled to get into first gear! But that is a bit of a problem and quite a funny story too! xx

  2. Dear Lord - I thought the first pic was your car gone through a store window! Not even contemplating how Tartarus would take that! ;-)

  3. I've been a total disaster area lately, cutting, stabbing and burning myself with alarming frequency. I managed to stab my finger with the tip of a knife while cutting an onion yesterday. I can't even work out how I managed that. Does that count?

  4. I reversed into the corner of a barn, and no, I didn't see it. It was dark, pissing down with rain, and I had a wife and son all giving me conflicting directions. $1,000 later, we have a new rear bumper, and I have some new glasses.

  5. I haven't reversed over anything lately, but it has happened more than once that I open the tailgate to my station wagon and glass bottles of wine or soda will tumble out of the car and smash on the ground.

    In my city, this lady, who was foolishly driving with her broken foot in a cast, somehow reversed up the steps to the public library and made a huge whole through one of the stone steps.

  6. my friend reversed into his house last month... literally embbeded his car half in......not something we're going to let him forget any day soon!!x

  7. I haven't gone into reverse, but I'm kinda stuck in neutral. No car, just me... Hope the soda bread worked out :)

  8. I'm glad I don't drive (nor live on your island) :)

  9. Backing into things is my speciality...it's so easily done...I usually choose something low and bollardy, which causes a small amount of physical damage but immense financial and insurance hit.


I'd love you to comment, but I get a phenomenal amount of spam comments on here for some reason - so everything is moderated. But only for spam. Any other comment will be posted :-D

Explore the ruined citadel of m'blog: