He decided to change the bed. Which was due. So I helped excavate the duvet from within its cover and I decided that his pillow was too manky to be put back on the bed (what DOES he exhale?!) and put the pillow in for a wash.
Reader, there then followed a DISASTER. Evidence Exhibit 1:
These were, not 4 hours ago, a pair of pale green, hand-knitted size 5 cashmere bed socks owned and loved by yours truly. Now they wouldn't fit a toddler thanks to the inadvertent felting process that they underwent when Tartarus attempted to wash his pillow this morning at what must have been a 'boil' setting.
He is truly apologetic and has even offered to buy me another pair of bed socks. He even proffered a pair of his never-rotting merchant navy socks which were hastily deposited back in his sock drawer as I reached for the gleaming new kitchen knife.
However, before you get up in arms, dear reader, at my unreasonableness - be assured that he is still stab-free. And out buying me a Belgian Bun for smoko :-)
*busies herself looking for hand-knitted cashmere socks on Etsy*
Oh dear, how tragic :( I'd offer to knit you a pair but I still have DH's kilt hose to finish from before last Christmas. It's not that I take long to knit a pair of socks, but I lost my place in the pattern. which is quite complex and multi-sized based on 3 different measurement, so I have to start from the beginning of the instructions and work out how many stitches I should have in each bit of the pattern to work out where I am . A pair of bed socks I could knock up in a few days
ReplyDeleteGood. Get his unfinished hose off the needles and get me a pair of new bedsox knat before hypothermia sets in :-D
Deletewhat is 'smoko' ??
ReplyDeleteViv - you are a woman who can argue in Latin! But you need a wider education - smoko takes place mid-morning and mid-afternoon and involves (in this house at any rate) strong tea/coffee and assorted biscuitery :-D
DeleteAli x
At least he attempted to do "his bit"
ReplyDeleteI always thought that seamen just used to put all their washing into a bucket which they then boiled.
Maybe he used that technique, excessive though it may seem?
Bedsocks?
Cold feet?
Maybe you need an electric heating pad as an extra "make up for destroying the socks" present?
Try here
You know that I am too scared to click on that link. I might end up teleported to Nuovo Nachos where you teach ;-D
DeleteNo, you're quite safe AliX, teleports don't work in Hell.
Deleteclicked! I used to have an electric blanket....I wonder whether it's safe to use something electrical that's been rolled up for about 20 years...Probly not :-D
DeleteAX
oops.... I was given a pair once and now know the true joy of cashmere sock .... I'm quite good at washing malfunctions myself.... once shrunk a much loved sweater with a huge cowl neck on it's inaugral wash that I machined instead of doing it by hand and it shrunk to doll-size .... I kept it in a bucket of water for a week like a dying fish, in the hopes it might grow back to normal size, unable to let it go.... a friend had to come round and throw it out in the end!!x
ReplyDeleteI currently have them sitting on the ironing board where I stare at them sadly and periodically try to haul them into some sort of shape. But they're done for I'm afraid *sobs*
DeleteDoll size is soooo depressing, isn't it?
AX
I learned that lesson quite a few years ago when i washed a hand knitted sweater that was lovingly made by my girlfriend at the time.
ReplyDeleteIt was almost fatal.
This WOULD have been a fatal blow, but for the fact it was clear that he was distraught at ruining them. It meant, after all, that he had a pair of freezing feet in the small of his back from here on in.
DeleteI haven't had a hand knat sweater since I was about 9 and my mum took pity on me and no longer compelled me to wear Auntie Mima's hideous hand-knitted efforts. Ah, those were the days!
AX
mister monkey has been banned from doing the washing (a ban that has obviously been lifted when i moved away to go to school last week) after washing a very nice and expensive shirt (his, luckily) with a bright red nightie (mine).
ReplyDeletei once owned two dresses that shrunk several sizes when washed in freezing cold water. needless to say, i now know which fabric to avoid like the plague.
sorry about the chaussettes.
Do you think that they make these washing errors to get them out of doing it in the future? If so, it's not working in our house, although I did wonder how two socks could end up in the wash with a pillow - it's not like a duvet case where things can disappear into the corners and emerge many months later as a crumpled corner-shaped rock.
DeleteFingers crossed for SCHOOL for you!!!!
Ali x
Hey, at least he didn't suggest you knit yourself another pair :D That wouldn't definitely be justification for stabbing!
ReplyDeleteHe knows that I've had the same denim blue half-sock on my needles for YEARS. He also knows not to mention it anymore ;-)
DeleteBed socks?
ReplyDeletePeople still wear bed socks?
Hello Wine Guy - pleased to meet you *shakes hands formally*
DeleteIn Scotland, where we use our Winter Duvet all year, yes, bed socks are de rigour - unless one fancies a pair of cold feet in the kidneys in the middle of the night :-D
Ali x
I've got a lovely cashmere pullover and it has to be washed in soap flakes, then dried flat (and kept moving so that it doesn't pick up lines from the drying rack. Bit of a faff, but it's in my A list Special Reserve category of clothes and women fall at my feet when I walk into a room with it on.
ReplyDeleteLooby - try laying a clean tea towel (a non fluffy one!) out on the clothes rack and draping your pullover over the towel, rather than the rails? Might help keep the rail marks at bay?
DeleteI don't think I've ever met a bloke with a cashmere pullover before *dead impressed face*
Ali x
Better yet, lay the washed sweater on a towel and roll it up (not too tight). That way you don't get any lines!
DeleteOh hey, if you haven't had any luck yet, you may want to check sock dreams out. http://www.sockdreams.com/products/sock-collections/cashmere/ I'm not sure they have hand-knit, but I have a pair of the jane anklets that I wear to work that are super comfy. 8)
ReplyDelete*felting*have done this on countless occasion but never with socks!
ReplyDeleteI too wear bed socks despite being told by a regular that wearing them causes fungal foot infection,I'm always cold.
This reminded me of a recent trip over the border,when shown to our room there was a pair of worn socks lying on the pillow,the person who showed us to the room looked embarrassed,grabbed them but didn't say anything,didn't swap the pillow either..